


you better run from me (before i take your soul)

by tkreyesevandiaz



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Abusive Parents, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Buck's parents, Buckley-Diaz family, Childhood Trauma, Concerned Firefam, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Firefam Feels, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Happy Ending, Homophobia, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Love Confessions, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Mild canon divergence, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Protective Firefam, Racism, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, Tumblr Prompt, dad!bobby, mom!Athena, slightly ooc?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-18 11:29:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21610189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tkreyesevandiaz/pseuds/tkreyesevandiaz
Summary: Tumblr Ask Box FicPrompt: Sad/Hurt Feelings at a Party for the kissing prompts
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Athena Grant, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan “Buck” Buckley & Bobby Nash, Evan “Buck” Buckley & Original Characters
Comments: 129
Kudos: 899





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ariquitecontrary](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariquitecontrary/gifts), [roylbluu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roylbluu/gifts), [Starlight00001](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starlight00001/gifts).



> Hello! I'm back with yet another fic that got away from me...clearly. This was asked by @ariquitecontrary on Tumblr, and this fic is posted there too! There is a link to the kissing prompts list in the actual text (because I don't know how to add them here! xD)
> 
> I hope you enjoy this one! The title is from Flames by R3HAB, ZAYN, and Jungleboi and that's the song I was listening to while writing this! I thought it fit pretty perfectly here ;) 
> 
> Trigger warning: Anxiety and Panic Attacks, childhood abuse, brief racism/homophobia! Please be safe :) <3
> 
> Leave me Kudos and Comments guys!

**Prompt: sad or hurt feelings at a party[(kissing prompts)](https://zeethebooknerd.tumblr.com/post/189021483639/a-kissing-prompt-list)**

The last people Evan Buckley thought he’d run into on this call, were his parents.

The call had been a relatively easy one, just a child who’d somehow gotten his foot stuck between the rungs of a chair, which had led to quite a few people tripping over him. After dealing with the sprained joints and aching muscles, Buck finally took a step back to just look around at the rich people parade. The location was at an upscale ballroom filled to the brim with business magnates, investors, other stockholders and lingering employees. Tables filled with tiny appetizers were backed up against the wall, many people hesitantly picking one of the delicacies up.

 _Hors d'oeuvres_ if Buck remembered correctly.

Just as Eddie and him brought up the rear, joking about the ridiculousness of children sticking limbs wherever they thought they could fit them, a voice calling out behind him stopped him in his tracks.

“Is this what you ran away to do?” 

That voice couldn’t be mistaken. Buck’s spine went ramrod straight as he registered his father’s voice for the first time in years. He knew that his mother would be hovering right near him, and as he turned around slowly, his suspicions were confirmed.

His mother’s eyes looked indifferent after seeing her son for the first time in years, nimble fingers loosely grasping one of those mini champagne flutes. His father, on the other hand, looked livid. Well, as livid as he could look in public. 

The expression reminded him of all those events he’d attended when he was younger, and his father was trying to remain cool and collected after Buck had pissed him off. A forced smile, a burning fire of anger in his eyes, a tighter-than-normal grip on Buck’s arm. It would always mean that Buck was to be punished when they got home. Even a near-decade later, he still couldn’t figure out what it was that he had done to make his father so angry, but that look still made him feel so small and insignificant. 

“Yeah. Yeah it is.” Buck hated the way his voice shook slightly, hated the tremble in his hands as he stood in front of the man who had turned his life into a living hell. 

Even after all this time away from it all, he wasn’t being able to work past the issues his parents had left him with. The hurt buried itself so deep inside Buck that he didn't know who he was without it anymore.

In truth, Buck had run away to break free from it all. He didn’t want that life for himself, a life full of pure abuse and virtually no loving touch. He’d tried a million different jobs and things during his undergraduate before he found his fit at the LAFD. There was no way Buck would let his parents ruin this for him, but in a way, he knew they already had.

Briefly, he registered the unmistakable touch of Eddie’s fingers against the small of his back and was grateful that his best friend was trying to ground him. He hadn’t shared anything about his parents with anyone, not even Maddie, but Eddie knew him far too well. Buck knew he could immediately sense the cloaking tension and was trying his best to work through the entire thing without alerting the rest of the 118.

“That’s no way to greet your mother after all this time. Come give me a hug, Evan,” his mom said in a faux-sweet voice. Furrowing his eyebrows, he looked around to see that they had garnered a few curious eyes. Clenching his jaw to not cause a scene, he stepped forward and bent to hug his mom. 

“There’s a party tonight from the Los Angeles Business Convention, and I expect you to be there.” Buck frowned before catching himself a second too late. As his father stepped forward, Buck _flinched_ just like he used to as a child, unconsciously stepping back against Eddie’s chest. To the older man’s credit, he didn’t move an inch, letting Buck pull strength from his solid form.

“I have plans tonight.” The lie slipped off his tongue easily, but just as he expected, his father shrugged.

“Cancel them. You haven’t seen us in eight years, I think you can spare an evening for us. Isn’t that right?” It was a threat disguised as a command.

Buck dipped his head low, not meeting his father’s eyes. “Yes, sir.” Just as he made a move to turn and leave, his father stopped him with a question that had his blood running cold.

“Have you seen Maddie? I haven’t talked to her in a while either.” Buck knew that there was no way he was letting his father know that Maddie was in LA as well.

“I haven’t met, seen or talked to her since she left with Doug.” He prayed that nothing on Eddie’s face would give his lie away. His father gave a satisfied smile. Buck knew how much he liked Doug. Probably because the two of them were cut from the same cloth, both abusers.

In Doug’s case, there had been no child to take his anger out on, thankfully; instead he took it out on his wife. In Richard Buckley’s case, it was always Buck who faced the brunt. For not being strong enough, for not getting the best grade, for not being able to do things right, for just not being enough.

“Well, Doug always was the son I wanted. So kind and hardworking, and he takes such good care of your sister too.” For a few moments, all Buck saw was red. He wanted to _scream_ at his father that Doug had _destroyed_ so many lives, that he wasn’t _kind_ or _hardworking_ and he sure as hell didn’t take _care_ of Maddie. Not to mention he was dead.

He’d destroyed Maddie completely, enough that she was terrified of holidays, terrified of taking a chance with a man that would damn well treat her the way she deserved to be. She lived in constant horror and guilt at having killed a man she once _had_ loved. He’d left Chim in the dust; left him searching for a way to fight his way back to Maddie, even when he himself was standing on rocky ground. He’d destroyed every bit of _Buck_ who had resented Maddie for abandoning him with the two people that she knew he would never feel safe, destroyed every part of Buck that wanted to protect Maddie the best he could.

A grip around his wrist brought him back to where they were standing. Eddie’s weight was reassuring next to him, and he turned his head to look at his best friend. Buck hadn’t realized he’d curled his hands up tightly, a murderous expression on his face.

Thankfully, Bobby radioed in, the buzz of both Eddie’s and Buck’s radios snapping him out of a stupor. “Buckley, Diaz, get in the truck.” 

Buck let out a whoosh of air before nodding at Eddie, relaxing just a smidgen.

“Let’s go, Buck.” Eddie’s voice was unwavering as he turned back to look at Buck’s father. He nodded a single goodbye to both parents before pulling Buck behind him. “Bobby’s waiting.”

“You had better come tonight. We’ll wait on you.”

Buck took the card his father held out to him and stiffly gave his parents one last hug before he turned and walked away, his uniform suddenly too tight for him and his father’s words ringing in his ears.

* * *

_Back and forth. Back and forth. Sit down. Bounce leg. Stand up. Back and forth. Back and forth._

Buck paced barefoot in the tiny bunk room, repeating the routine with no idea what to do next. The cold tile always managed to help him break free from the lingering anxiety, but it wasn’t doing anything today. He rubbed his chest absentmindedly as the room got smaller and tighter around him. It was getting harder and harder to breathe with the weight on his lungs and the uniform wasn’t helping. 

He _needed_ something.

He needed his safety blanket.

He needed Eddie.

Throwing open the door, Buck was met with Eddie’s form leaning against the wall. Almost as if he’d known that Buck would want him close. Buck locked eyes with him, not knowing how to make his voice ask what he wanted from him, his mouth opening and closing several times in an attempt to say _something_.

But this was Eddie. Eddie always knew what he needed.

* * *

Backing Buck into the room, Eddie locked the door behind them and turned around to look at his best friend’s vulnerable form. Buck was practically vibrating with his anxiety and panic, and Eddie needed to calm him down before this turned into a full-fledged panic attack.

Settling Buck down on the bed, he knelt in front of him to push Buck’s head down to his knees. “Breathe with me, sweetheart. In and out.” He modeled the breathing pattern, having Buck do the same. Inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

The two men repeated this pattern until Buck lifted his head up to look at Eddie with teary eyes. The sight of the younger man looking so vulnerable and broken tore at Eddie, punched the breath out of him, and for a very long moment, he envisioned knocking Buck’s father onto his ass. 

He’d noticed Buck recoil as his father came near, seen how straight and tight his posture had become as soon as the voice registered. Even army men didn’t stand with such a perfect posture, but the way Buck had closed up immediately filled in a lot of blanks about the man. 

“Buck,” Eddie said in a low voice, placing his hands palm-first on Buck’s thighs. “Just focus on the weight of my hands, okay?” Eddie pressed down a little, watching as Buck’s eyes snapped open to zero in on where Eddie was touching him.

“I hate him so much. I hate that he does this to me,” Buck whispered, his voice weak. Eddie stayed silent, rubbing circles on Buck’s inner thighs with his thumbs. He knew that all Buck needed was time to open up.

“He was never the father you are, never ideal. He used to hit me a lot.” Eddie felt a familiar rage stir up inside of him but kept his expression blank as he listened to Buck’s emotionless voice. “It was never enough, you know? No matter what I did, there was always something better I could’ve done. I wasn’t enough for anything. Still aren’t.

“He’s the CEO of a very big company, and he wanted me to go into law. I didn’t want to, I was so interested in medicine at the time, enough that I was sure I could’ve become a doctor, just like Maddie had become a nurse.” Buck laced their fingers together as if to reassure himself that Eddie was still there. It was an intimate gesture, pushing the two men over a line they’d been skirting around.

“I ran away after I sent my college applications in and received their acceptance letters. I secretly sent one to UCLA too, because I was so prepared to get out of that hell and go as far as I could. But when the letter came in, my father saw it before I did. That night, he thrashed me so hard, Eds. Hands, belts, fists, you name it.” Buck closed his eyes, probably going back into the memory. Eddie squeezed his hand, prompting him to open his eyes and stay with him, even as his rage escalated. “I remember stumbling around in my bathroom, looking for first aid supplies and being grateful that Maddie had left, just so she wouldn’t have to see her little brother like that.”

“Buck...” Eddie began. Buck shushed him with one trembling hand on his shoulder, mirroring Eddie from all those weeks ago.

“There’s no one in this world I trust with me more than you.” The younger man cracked a tiny smile as he threw Eddie’s words back at him. Eddie fell silent, warmth burning his chest as he mirrored Buck’s soft smile with a wider one.

The smile dropped as Buck continued. “The envelope hadn’t even been opened. It was still intact when I finally managed to get my hands on it. I snuck it into my room and opened it to find an acceptance letter and a full ride. Someone had definitely been looking out for me.” Eddie’s eyes shot up at that. Buck never mentioned anything about UCLA, much less a full ride.

“I wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth, so I gathered up what little I needed, plus the money I’d been saving for years and got out. Somehow, I managed a ticket to LA and I started my freshman year at UCLA as a Biology major. Along the way, I managed to get a certificate in fire science as well, before I ended up at the LAFD. Those were some of my best times, because I was as free as I could be under the circumstances. It was the first time in _years_ that I would go three days without a new bruise. But my father haunted me at every turn.”

“This was the first time I’ve seen him since I ran away, and I’m still struggling Eddie.” Buck closed his eyes as if in pain, and Eddie’s heart felt like it was being squeezed tightly. He gently tugged one hand free to bring it to Buck’s uniform shirt, unbuttoning the material Buck had been pulling at ever since they’d gotten in the truck. 

“I’ve got you,” he whispered soothingly as he opened the shirt completely, letting it fall open on Buck’s sides. His muscles started to cramp up from sitting in an awkward position for so long. As he shifted on the heels of his feet, Buck pulled him up to the edge of the bunk. 

“Will you-” Buck hesitated, avoiding eye contact with him. “Will you lay down with me?”

Eddie smiled and toed off his shoes. He slid into the bunk first, with Buck pushing him further back on the bed. Thankfully, the room was private and there was only one bed anyway. 

Wrapping an arm around the taller man, Eddie pulled Buck back into his chest and smiled as the man instinctively curled up into his side. Buck turned to face him and rested his head in the crook of Eddie’s arm and torso so he could peer up at Eddie.

“I can’t do this without you, Eds.” The quiet admission ripped a hole through him. 

“You don’t have to, darling. I’ll be there with you every step of the way,” Eddie answered immediately, leaning forward to press his forehead against Buck’s. A tear slipped out of Buck’s eye at the contact, and he tightened his grip on Eddie just that little bit more.

To anyone else, this would look suspiciously like two lovers locked in a moment, and for a fleeting second, Eddie let himself believe it too.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away with the lawsuit, and I’m sorry I took a step that meant going away from my family.” Eddie reeled back at Buck’s exhausted tone. The lawsuit had been so long ago, he had no idea Buck was still beating himself up about it, especially considering how many times they’d talked about it. Especially after how many times Eddie and Christopher had reassured them that it wasn’t his fault, and they didn’t blame him. “I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for you two.”

Eddie’s blood turned cold as he turned to look down at the man in his arms, a rebuke on his tongue. But Buck was already snoring softly against Eddie’s side before he could say that Buck had always been more than enough.

The words stayed with him as he held onto Buck tightly. Sleep was nowhere near him as he turned the past few weeks and the events of today over in his mind. The words Buck had uttered just before falling asleep were as familiar to Eddie as the back of his hand, but it’d been his son and best friend to show him how important Eddie was to them. When had Eddie and Christopher stopped letting _Buck_ know the same thing? 

Eddie was not a get-attached type of guy, but with Buck, all his rules had flown straight out the window the minute the man started peacocking around on Eddie’s first day. Seeing Buck call up Bobby to let them know about Christopher coming to the station only sealed the deal; Eddie found himself head over heels for the younger man before he even knew what was going on.

The tsunami had definitely set them apart, but Eddie had been under the impression that they’d bridged it; in fact, they ended up closer than they had been before. Buck and Christopher spent weeks together learning how to not fear water, and while Christopher had pretty much fought his apprehensiveness around water, Eddie did still catch Buck flinching or shying away from the sounds of rain or running water. They’d stayed up nights together, the three of them, trying to get past the nightmares of losing one another, or in Eddie’s case, both of the boys who held his heart. 

And then the lawsuit happened.

Not being able to talk to Buck had destroyed the last of his patience, and suddenly, he didn’t know where to turn. He and Christopher had lost their footing without the third member of their family, and if Eddie was being completely honest with himself, it was coming to the realization that Buck was integral to the Diaz boys that hit him the hardest; it wasn’t just the Diaz family, they were very proudly the Buckley-Diaz’s. 

Even if they hadn’t talked about it yet. 

Eddie’s thoughts shifted to Buck’s dad and how set in stone he was. He couldn’t get how small Buck looked in front of him out of his mind. Buck always carried himself with so much confidence that it was disconcerting to see him shrink into himself. He could still feel the tremor in Buck’s body from where he’d backed into him. Eddie never wanted to see Buck like that ever again; he deserved to be open and laughing the entire time. 

He decided he would tell Buck about it tonight. He would tell Buck everything.

* * *

Buck stirred awake, feeling hotter than normal before he realized that he was locked in Eddie’s arms. The small bunk didn’t give them much room to move so the entire line of his body was pressed up against Eddie’s.

Tilting his head, he smiled up at the sleeping man. Eddie’s mouth was slightly open, warm gusts of air ruffling Buck’s hair. His grip around Buck was tight, even while asleep. Buck’s chest warmed with the emotions he felt for this man.

He took a few moments to recollect how they ended up in this precarious position, the bliss of waking up in Eddie’s arms fading to a panic about tonight’s event.

“I can hear you thinking over there,” Eddie mumbled sleepily, pulling Buck tighter against him, if possible. The movement felt so natural that Buck couldn’t help but take a calming breath of Eddie’s clean scent. “Don’t do it too hard, or you’ll hurt yourself.”

“Funny,” Buck muttered, making a move to get up. It was hard to get out of that cocoon of warmth, but he managed it. Swinging his legs over the bed, Buck just sat there for a moment, the tremble returning to his hands.

Eddie’s tan hand came around to grasp his pale one, squeezing it tightly as if he could stop the shaking. “Why don’t you come over to get ready? Chris is with my Tía today.” 

Under normal circumstances, Buck would’ve told Eddie that he didn’t need to come with him. But this was his father, and Eddie had always been the one to anchor him. It was Eddie who brought Buck back from the edge tonight, and he had no doubt that with his partner by his side, he could get through these three hours.

Taking a deep breath, Buck nodded at Eddie, still not being able to look the man in the eye as he straightened his clothing. 

“I’ve got your back, okay?” Eddie’s soft reply came just as Buck was leaving. He paused and looked over his shoulder at his best friend lying on his side, peering up at Buck with a reassuring grin. Buck felt a rush of love for Eddie tighten his throat, and he couldn’t resist giving him a genuine smile. 

“I know. Thank you.”

“Awesome. Now get out.” Eddie settled back down and turned to sleep. Buck looked at his back for a bit, unsure of what he’d done to deserve him. “Stop staring at my ass, and go talk to Bobby. He was worried about you.”

“It’s a mighty fine ass if I do say so myself,” Buck teased lightly, laughing at Eddie’s grumbling as he left. He felt marginally like himself as he climbed the stairs to go find Bobby.

As expected, Bobby was whipping something up in the kitchen. He must’ve heard Buck’s footsteps because he spoke without turning around. 

“Sleep well?” Bobby came around to the table with a plate of food. It wasn’t anything too heavy, just chicken noodle soup and some croutons. Buck stared at the plate, too raw from his encounter with his biological parents to receive the care from the man who he’d always regarded as a father figure. 

“Yeah, I did. Thanks,” Buck said quietly, not sure he’d be able to manage a louder sentence without crying.

As he tried sipping the soup without feeling like throwing up, he sensed Bobby’s eyes on him. Setting the spoon down, he turned to look at his captain only to be taken aback by the fond look on his face.

“Buck, you know that family is what we make of it, right?” Bobby said, passing him the salt with a teasing glint. Buck smiled at the gesture before concentrating on what Bobby was trying to say.

“I’m not sure how much weight this will have, kid, but I’m willing to try anyway.” Bobby took a deep breath before continuing. “I’m so proud of you, kiddo. I know I was tough on you when you came in, but you’ve always proven yourself to be selfless and determined to go after what you wanted. And all that ever matters in the grand scheme of things is the family you make for yourself.” Buck was enraptured by every genuine word Bobby said, feeling his face frozen in a shocked expression.

Bobby paused before choosing to continue. “There’s a saying, ‘blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.’ All that means is that the bonds we form ourselves are stronger ties than those we form by default. You’re part of this 118 family, Evan, but I think even you know that you’re such a great part of the Diaz family as well. So when you think you’re alone, try to remember that.” Bobby didn’t use Buck’s first name, pretty much ever. Having it spoken in a gentle, fatherly tone had him bowing his head as tears fell from his eyes. Bobby cocked his head towards where they could hear Hen and Chim arguing heatedly about something random, smirking as he did so. “We may be insane but we love you and we’re here for you.”

“Bobby, I…” Before he could finish the sentence, Bobby had folded him into a hug. Buck finally broke completely, releasing gasping breaths into his captain’s chest. When he felt like he’d calmed down some, he pulled away and thanked him for the kind words, slightly embarrassed by his breakdown. “You’ve always been the first man I’ve looked up to, and I don’t think that will ever change.” 

“I know, kid, and I appreciate you everyday. Now eat your food before your shift ends,” Bobby smiled at the words, letting a teasing lilt take over his tone as he stood up. He clapped Buck on the shoulder before going downstairs to where Hen and Chim were cleaning the ambulance.

Buck quickly finished his food before excusing himself and going back to the bunk room where him and Eddie had just been prior. He opened the door quietly to see Eddie softly snoring, but peculiarly backed all the way against the wall as if he expected Buck to come back.

The entire thing was so _domestic_ that Buck couldn’t help but chuckle quietly as he crawled back into bed with him. Eddie’s arms near-immediately shot out to pull Buck closer, still asleep. Buck laughed to himself at that before dozing off.

* * *

“God _damn it!_ ” Buck cursed as he dropped the tie for the twentieth time. He looked in the mirror at Eddie, who stood in the doorway with a crease between his brows, mouth pressed into a thin line.

Silently, he padded into the room and picked up the tie, turning Buck to face him. Buck closed his eyes, trying to calm down. Eddie’s palm on his chest helped bring him back to where they were standing.

Opening them, he found his best friend looking at him with _something_ in his gaze. 

“We don’t have to go Buck. You’ve made your own life here, you don’t owe them anything.”

“I know, but I know he won’t leave me alone, even if he’s only in LA for a few days. I don’t want him going looking for Maddie.” Buck had let Maddie know what had happened, omitting the part where the abuse got worse after she left. He hated that their dad was making her look over her shoulder again, but what choice did he have?

Eddie took a deep breath as he straightened the tie. He’d purposely made it as loose as he could so it wasn’t suffocating Buck any further, a gesture that made his heart swoop. He took a quick moment to appreciate how amazing Eddie looked in that suit of his, despite how high-strung his anxiety made him feel.

“I didn’t want this to be the way I confess to you, but there’s no planning the perfect moment,” Eddie admitted softly, his fingers smoothing the tie down. “But whatever happens tonight, just keep in mind that I love you.” Buck’s head snapped up at that, locking eyes with Eddie. He looked calm and collected, but there was still a nervous glint in his expression. “Christopher and I have always thought of you as our home, and we love you so much.”

“I love you guys, too.” Those three words were enough to settle Buck back into his skin. Eddie beamed at him before lacing their fingers together and tugging Buck towards the door.

Buck stayed stiff all the way to the hotel where the event was being held. His grip on Eddie’s hand periodically loosened and tightened. As Eddie drove, he stole glances at Buck who was staring fixedly out the passenger window. 

When they arrived, Eddie gave his keys to the valet only to find Buck still sitting in the car. He rounded the truck to his door, pulling it open, pasting a reassuring smile on his face. 

“I’ve got you Buck, you can do this.” Eddie saw the moment Buck steeled his resolve as he stepped down from the truck. They walked in to find Buck’s parents waiting on them. 

“Mom, Dad, this is my boyfriend, Eddie Diaz,” Buck introduced as he leaned forward to give his mother a hug. Eddie watched Buck’s father carefully, who looked like he was about to have an aneurysm at the introduction. In his mind, he was decking Richard Buckley for all that he had put Buck through, and it was that fantasy that would probably get him through the evening.

He saw it on his face before the man even opened his mouth, a familiar product of growing up as a person of color.

“A greaser and a wetback? Evan, I expected better of you.” His eyebrows shot up at the double insult, about to say something but Buck looked absolutely enraged as he stepped into his father’s space.

“You will respect the man I love, because he _is_ the best. Apologize to him, _right now,_ ” Buck hissed at him, his voice low and dangerous. Eddie had never heard Buck sound like that, but _damn_ if it didn’t make him feel hot under the collar, no matter how inappropriate the thought was at the moment. Eddie knew Buck was probably relishing the brief flash of fear that crossed his face, because he sure as hell was. The cold that had frozen him in place at being outright insulted thawed at Buck’s reaction.

Richard shot a quick reluctant apology in Eddie’s direction before looking at Buck with so much anger that Eddie felt the faint tremors in Buck as the fight drained out of him. 

Intervening, Buck’s mother held a hand out to Eddie, who shook it with a tight smile. “Patricia Buckley,” she purred at him. Eddie snatched his hand back as quickly as he could, stepping slightly into Buck’s side. 

He knew that Buck hadn’t missed the blatant flirting. Eddie tangled his fingers with Buck’s as his parents walked in to grab a seat.

“I’m sorry, Eddie, I should’ve realized that they would be like that,” Buck said sadly, lifting their hands and pressing a quick kiss to the back of Eddie’s.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. Like I said, it’s just a few hours. Then we can go home and collapse in bed together.” He leaned towards his boyfriend to whisper in his ear. “You’re so hot when you get riled up like that.” Buck cracked a smile at that, looking a little more at ease. Eddie grinned and him and hand-in-hand, they walked inside.

* * *

It wasn’t like Buck hated everything about these events. He recognized a few familiar faces and talked to them genuinely, relaxing as they laughed over something. Eddie’s hand remained tight in his. Surprisingly enough, Eddie found an old army friend of his at the same event, and introduced Buck to him. Marcus shared quite a few interesting stories from Eddie’s days as an army medic that had him looking at his boyfriend wildly as they laughed at his expense.

The entire night hadn’t gone bad, with Buck staying as far away from his parents as humanly possible in a space like this. It was right at the end of the event, as they finished up dinner that Buck’s dad decided to drop the bomb.

“You should come back to Pennsylvania with us.” It wasn’t a suggestion. Eddie’s hand clamped down on Buck’s thigh. Buck drew strength from him as he answered his father.

“I have my life here, I’m not going back.” Buck pushed the remainder of his food around in his plate, picking up the wine glass and taking a long swallow. 

“It’s time you enter a respectable profession, you could’ve been one of the top lawyers in the country, Evan.” His tone remained patronizing, while his mother nervously looked between father and son, still as silent as ever.

“Just like you? Your father wanted you to go into law too, but you wanted to go into business. As I recall, you did practice law before opening up the business. I’m just doing something that makes me happy off the bat, why is that so hard for you to accept?” Buck had never spoken to his father like that, too afraid of what would come next to say anything. It was the combination of Eddie’s solid form pressed against him and the copious amounts of wine that had loosened his tongue.

“You’re just like me, Evan. I’m your father.” Buck felt the bile crawl up his throat, and though his mind knew that they’re _not_ the same, his insecurities and fears made him doubt every single day and action of his life. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

It was a vile sentence that stayed with him as he and Eddie left, as Eddie drove back home and parked the car, as they went inside and toed their shoes and socks off. He’d sensed Eddie’s concerned eyes on him for the entire length of the drive as Eddie kept up a one-sided conversation to keep Buck out of his head.

It didn’t work. Buck stumbled into the bathroom of Eddie’s room, feeling suffocated to within an inch of his life and suspiciously like puking.

Which he did. He threw up all of the light dinner he’d had at just how disgusted and nauseous his father’s words made him feel. Eddie was there in an instant, rubbing his back, brushing his hair away from his face and placing a comforting palm on Buck’s clammy forehead. He took the cup Eddie offered, swirling mouthwash around his mouth and spitting the horrible post-vomit taste out into the sink.

Buck’s skin felt like it was crawling with bugs, the words slithering around on him. He just _hurt_ so much. He frantically worked to tear the suit off, his shaking fingers fumbling with the buttons digging into his nails. Eddie came up to him and grabbed him by the wrists, pulling his hands away before Buck hurt himself.

“Buck, Buck, Buck.” Eddie repeated his name over and over, trying to get his attention. “Buck, _Evan_ _please_.” That stopped Buck in his tracks, the syllable rolling off Eddie’s tongue to pin him in place.

Just as he had in the bunk room, Eddie took over for him, gently but quickly taking the coat and shirt off. Buck climbed straight into the shower stall and switched the water on, never-minding that it was ice cold. His pants soaked through as he furiously rubbed soap into his skin, turning it bright red with how rough he was being.

He didn’t realize he was crying until Eddie stepped into the shower with him, taking the bar of soap away from him. Eddie washed his hair for him and soaped down the exposed skin, his touch erasing whatever Buck had been trying to cleanse himself of. His knees buckled as he fell forward into Eddie’s grip, clutching at the now-wet shirt.

_The apple doesn’t far fall from the tree._

The words were unwelcome but they brought Buck to his senses.

“Eddie, Eddie you have got to go. Didn’t you hear Dad? We’re the same, I’ll destroy Chris. I’ll end up like my father, I’ll _destroy_ Christopher. I’m no good for your son, or for you. You _can’t_ love me, you-you have _got to go,_ ” Buck rambled rapidly and frantically, weakly pushing at him. Eddie’s heart broke at how insistently Buck was trying to put this wall up between them. He quickly turned the dial on warm before wrapping his arms tightly around the younger man, the two of them sinking to the floor of the shower.

“No, Evan. You are _nothing_ like your father. Nothing at all. You love Christopher so much, tell me you remember that.” Eddie’s tone turned desperate as he tried to hold Buck together as tightly as he could. His anxiety over his father must have been far greater than his apprehensiveness about water, because Buck didn’t even flinch as the water kept pouring down on them. Buck looked absolutely wrecked and miserable, hair plastered against his forehead and his lips moving in a soundless chant. 

It took Eddie a moment to realize that Buck kept repeating “no” under his breath over and over again.

He tried another tactic. “Remember when Christopher got sick two weeks ago? I don’t think I was as hectic as you were, rushing around the place to get blankets and pillows and comforters, sitting me down besides him while you made him Maddie’s infamous sick-soup. You picked up all the medicine and made sure he took it on time, and you were there every time you weren’t on shift, not even letting Carla watch him.”

“And last weekend when Chris wanted to go to the zoo, and I ended up having to cover someone else? You didn’t want to break his heart so you were the one that took him. He was so happy when you two came home all decked out in matching penguin costumes that made you guys look so stupidly adorable.”

“Remember when you came with me to his parent-teacher meeting because he talked non-stop about you and his teachers wanted to meet you so bad that they _called_ me to bring you along? And the time you held us together after Shannon died, because I couldn’t look after both myself and Christopher? Bobby gave you that time off without any of us asking because he knew we would need you.”

Eddie kept going, relaying the constant presence of Buck in their lives, but reassuring him that he wasn’t anything like his father. He rocked Buck back and forth under the spray, trying to keep his tone calm. Buck’s slippery skin made it hard to keep hold on him, but Eddie managed it. 

Seeing Evan Buckley like this scared him. It made him wonder exactly how many nights the poor man spent alone, trying to fight his demons without anyone in his corner.

“Remember those nights we stayed up late coloring under the blankets with Chris? And the movie nights where he would cuddle into you? How many times Christopher has fallen asleep with his head on your chest and your hand cradling his head, completely nightmare-free because you were there?”

“Do you remember making obscene amounts of popcorn during a sports night only for you and Chris to throw kernels at the TV when something wasn’t going right?” Buck had pressed his face into Eddie’s chest, almost as if he could live there. He clutched at him tighter, the shirt cutting into his skin.

Eddie’s heart clenched as he brought out the last weapon in his arsenal. “Two days ago, Christopher asked me if he could call you papa.” 

Eddie felt the moment Buck froze, going completely still. Only the sound of the water pattering against skin and cloth and tile surrounded them. “I told him to ask you what you wanted to be called.”

That unleashed the gates. Buck’s cries turned into sobs, the gasping sound tearing at Eddie as he held his boyfriend through it all. Eddie didn’t realize that he himself had been crying until he tasted salt on his tongue.

The two men stayed on the floor of the shower until the water ran cold. Not wanting either of them to catch a cold, Eddie reached up to shut the water off before gently and carefully pulling Buck into a standing position. 

“Let’s go sleep,” he whispered, not trusting his voice to _not_ break. He stepped onto the rug first, peeling off the white dress shirt and dropping it in the sink with a wet plop. The suit pants were next, leaving him in just his underwear until he wrapped a towel around his waist. Toweling his hair somewhat dry, Eddie turned around to find Buck stood there staring at the ground, his eyes unseeing. 

“Don’t even think about it,” Eddie said firmly, his hand falling from his hair. He knew that flush on Buck’s face; it was one of shame and embarrassment. “We all need to fall apart to be put back together, and I’m glad I could be here for you today, just like you were when I fell apart.” 

“Eddie.” Buck’s voice was hoarse, stripped raw with the force of his cries, but now he was looking at Eddie with so much appreciation and _love_ in his gaze that Eddie couldn’t help but come forward.

He hesitated for a second before pulling Buck out of the shower stall and right in front of him. “I love you. You are my heart.” Placing his hands on Buck’s shoulders, he leaned up and pressed a kiss to his lips.

Eddie felt a tear drop from Buck’s eye onto his own cheek before Buck pulled Eddie into him, deepening the kiss. It wasn’t one of those kisses that were frantic and desperate. This one made the world stop around him, and suddenly, it was just the two of them, enclosed in their little bubble. 

Buck pulled away, resting his forehead on Eddie’s. “Thank you, Eds.”

That was all that needed to be said. Eddie tilted Buck’s head up to quickly kiss him one more time before he stepped out of the bathroom to grab warm clothes for the two of them.

Throwing his own clothes on, he brought Buck a pair of clean underwear, sweatpants and one of his old long-sleeved sleep shirts. “Here. Drop the wet clothes in the sink, I’ll get to them at some point.” 

Before he left, he rubbed a towel through Buck’s hair, messing up the curls and having his hair stand on end. The two men laughed at how ridiculous their hair looked before Eddie left to give Buck a little privacy, setting up shop for bed. As he was replying to a message from Chris saying good night, he heard Buck move into the room behind him, his steps shy and unsure. Tapping out a quick reply from both him and Buck, knowing his son would be over the moon to hear from Buck, he set the phone down and reached out to his boyfriend.

“Come here,” Eddie said gently, already under the covers on the far side of the bed. Buck came forth without a word, slipping under the covers with him. The phone buzzed against the nightstand, and Eddie laughed at the text before showing it to Buck, who finally looked a lot lighter as he read Christopher’s “I love you Bucky, good night!” Buck touched the screen as if he could reach through to Christopher just by that, alternating between looking at the message and Eddie in awe.

“See?” he prodded softly, putting the phone back on the nightstand and lying down on his side next to Buck.

This time, Buck didn’t turn away from Eddie. He turned and snuggled closer until he could bury his face into the crook of Eddie’s neck. The position reminded him of how Christopher slept with him after a particularly horrible nightmare. 

Eddie chuckled before bringing his own arms up to bring Buck as close as possible. One hand came up to card through his damp hair, while the other smoothed up and down his spine. 

“You are more than enough, my love. You have always meant everything to me,” Eddie whispered into Buck’s hair, the words probably going unheard for how soft he said them. 

“What did you say?” Buck’s breath tickled the sensitive skin of his neck as he asked in a low tone. Eddie angled himself so he could look Buck in the eye, deciding that feeling exposed was worth giving Buck a part of himself back.

“You are more than enough, my love. You have always meant everything to me.” He needed Buck to understand that, and the only way he could think to do that was to offer all he had. “You are a wonderful father to our son, Buck. I have no doubts that you are nothing like your father, and I think you know that. We’re just going to have to make you believe it.” 

The words were soft, moving into territory they hadn’t outright talked about yet, but they led to Buck pulling himself up to kiss Eddie again. They moved against each other lovingly as hands clutched at every part of the other’s body they could reach. “I love you so much, Eddie, I don’t know what other words to use.”

“Those are enough. You are more than enough,” Eddie whispered against Buck’s lips, his thumb tracing patterns along the side of his face. He felt them curve up into a smile, even with his eyes closed.

Pulling away, Buck settled back into the crook of Eddie’s arm, this time turning to press his face into the space where shoulder met chest. Eddie kept running his fingers up and down the bumps of Buck’s spine, fingers tangling in his hair.

Minute by minute, he felt the tension drain from Buck as the younger man fell asleep. Eddie kept up with his ministrations as he closed his eyes, thankful for the man in his arms.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was requested by someone on Tumblr @circadian-sunshine! I'm not putting the prompt up here because it has spoilers for the fic ;) The prompt is at the bottom though! (on Tumblr I kinda don't have a choice with it but at least I can control it here!)
> 
> As always, beta'd by the wonderful @ariquitecontrary ! I love you! :) <3
> 
> Triggers: child abuse, abuse, violence, brief racism
> 
> I hope you guys like this!

“Buck, you have got to learn to say no,” Eddie wheezed out as he watched Christopher paste yet another sticker onto Buck’s white shirt. Buck was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the living room while Chris hovered around him to paste a multitude of random stickers he had found in his room.

He didn’t want them to go to waste so Buck suggested that he paste them on a shirt that he could keep. Then Christopher had the brilliant idea of having Buck _wear_ the shirt so he could stick them onto the fabric and see how they looked.

This wasn’t what Eddie had expected to see when he got back from grocery shopping but shit, he wasn’t complaining. Buck was sitting straight up, his hands in his lap to keep the fabric taut as Christopher peeled off another sticker and used Buck’s shoulder as a support to circle around to his back. Buck’s expression was a mix of fond and hidden regret as he struggled to hold the straight position.

“Where did you even get this idea?” Eddie asked, coming around with mugs of hot chocolate to put on the side table. Chris cheered, temporarily relieving Buck as he came over to grasp his mug. Buck slumped down exaggeratedly, breathing an inaudible sigh of relief.

“It was the first thing that came to mind when Chris pulled out those million packs of stickers.” Buck sent Christopher a playful look as he stood up. Eddie took a long look at the short-sleeved T-shirt Buck was wearing. There were so many random stickers that Eddie had had no idea were in his house.

“I don’t even know where half of these came from.” He observed the brightly colored stickers. There were smiley faces, ‘my name is’ tags with crayon names scrawled on them, animated character stickers, car stickers, some letter stickers and a few dozen other types. The square of stickers across Buck’s chest caught his attention and had him smiling into his hot chocolate. Christopher had put together a few of the letter stickers to spell Bucky, Christopher, Eddie with heart stickers in between the names. 

Eddie shook his head at his boyfriend who was trying to look down to see what Eddie was staring at. “Do you like it, Dad?” Chris piped up from his spot on the floor, eyes roaming critically over Buck. 

“It looks great _mijo,_ did you use all the stickers?” he asked, silently laughing at the look of horror on Buck’s face. Christopher looked around and spotted one last sticker packet.

“No, I think this is the last one.” Getting to his feet, he filled whatever blank spaces were there, pressing hard onto Buck’s skin. To his credit, Buck _was_ pretty excited about turning into a sticker board, it was sitting still and straight that got to him. Where Christopher couldn’t reach, Buck leaned down for him, ruffling the boy’s hair as he did so.

Eddie’s heart squeezed at the sight as he kept his gaze on his boys, bringing his mug to his mouth.

“Take the shirt off, Papa! I want to wear it.” Christopher eagerly tugged at the shirt. Buck’s face softened. Even after two months of Chris calling him ‘papa’, Buck still melted like putty every time. Eddie loved watching Buck marvel at Chris’ term of endearment for him, because it reminded him that despite Buck’s initial inhibitions that one fateful night, Buck had always proven himself to Christopher. 

He needed the extra special reminder, and Christopher had been the only one who could make him realize that he was _not_ like his father. Eddie could only hold him together this time, but Christopher was the glue that held the pieces of Buck together, and he was proud of their son for doing so.

Sometimes, he could still feel the press of Buck’s face into his chest, could still feel frantic hands clutch at him desperately, could still hear broken cries. He could still feel a thankful press of lips against his own, a hushed confession in the dark, a bone-deep trust for the man in front of him.

“Eddie, pull this off of me, so none of the stickers get torn off.” Buck’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. He set his mug down and stood to pull the shirt carefully collar-first over the taller man’s head.

Christopher was bouncing in place with his excitement, that had both Eddie and Buck laughing as Eddie tugged the shirt over his head. Buck’s shirt drowned him completely, but he looked to be over the moon to be wearing his creation.

Giving them a quick thank you, Chris busied himself with his hot chocolate and coloring books. Eddie and Buck took their seats on the couch, Buck automatically slotting into Eddie’s side as he picked up his own mug.

Entangling their fingers, the two men silently watched their son color, lost in their own thoughts.

They’d had the whole “boyfriend” conversation a few days after the event, even though they’d fallen into the relationship as naturally as one could. Buck had told him that there really was no better way for him to introduce Eddie to anyone. Eddie had easily agreed with it because honestly, they’d been dating for the longest time.

Christopher and Eddie had a talk about how Buck’s relationship with them was going to change slightly, and then after asking Christopher if it was okay if Buck dated his father, Buck proceeded to give Christopher the choice to his question.

When Buck told Christopher that it was okay if he didn’t want to call him anything but Buck, Eddie nearly started bawling right there at how _perfect_ his two boys really were, and how complete their little family really was. 

Bobby had HR approval forms filled out from months ago, and all that was really needed was their signatures. Eddie and Buck didn’t even question the thing, readily accepting that they’d had their heads up their asses for the longest time.

“You look like you had a productive afternoon,” Eddie broke the silence, shifting slightly to look at Buck. Buck laughed around the rim of his mug.

“Well, cleaning his room out turned into this.” Buck gestured at the shirt Chris was wearing. “But at least we got it cleaned up and all the stray toys put away. It didn’t take that much time, actually.”

“Now if it had been your room…” Eddie trailed off, grinning at the offended look on Buck’s face.

“My room is always super clean, shut up,” he pouted, sinking deeper into the cushions. Buck’s apartment wasn’t completely dirty, but enough that Eddie could stand to pull his leg over it. Eddie chuckled as Chris came over to them, climbing up on Buck’s lap and throwing his legs over Eddie’s.

Eddie knew what was going to happen even before it started. 

Chris hadn’t seen Buck’s tattoos in the flesh up until a few weeks ago. Since then, he’d climb up onto Buck’s lap and spend a while tracing the minimal lines, just like he did to Eddie. His son definitely had an affinity for ink.

It was one of Eddie and Buck’s favourite things to do too, but when they did it, things got out of hand more often than not. The heated look Buck sent him told him that he was thinking the same thing.

Chris brought one finger to the overlapping triangle-circle-square tattoo on Buck’s chest, tracing the geometric lines. Buck watched him almost reverently while Eddie reached over for his phone, this time wanting to capture the moment.

It was the perfect picture, Buck’s hands secure around Christopher to prevent him from tumbling down while he smiled at the boy, his laugh lines deep. Christopher was frozen in the middle of a grin too. That picture was definitely his new lock screen. And Buck being shirtless was just an added bonus.

“Are you done, Mr. Paparazzi?” Buck sassed, now having been pushed away from Eddie so Chris could run his finger along the face-and-heart tattoo on his side. It was one of Eddie’s favourites of Buck’s tattoos, the minimal head outline with a more detailed anatomical heart. 

Buck leaned on his elbow, sipping his hot chocolate as he looked bemusedly at Christopher. Eddie lifted a hand to join his finger alongside Christopher’s. He smirked at Buck’s reaction, pulling away to casually sip on his coffee again. 

He showed Buck and Christopher the photo, eliciting a joyful giggle from both of them just as Christopher moved his hand to the inside of Buck’s bicep, towards the circular tattoo. Just to tease him again, Eddie lashed his finger over the line going through it, earning a glare from Buck. He laughed and got up to put their mugs away. 

Just as he turned back, he took a look outside. It was a nice day out, and Chris had been pushing to go to the park for a while.

“Hey buddy, what do you say we go to the park?” Eddie called out from the kitchen as he started washing the mugs. As much as he liked spending time indoors with his boys, the sun would probably do them some good after the horrible weather week LA was having.

Chris gave a resounding cheer and Eddie smiled at the sound of him shuffling off Buck’s lap and clattering to his room to get ready. 

Two arms came around his waist just as he finished the task, pulling a happy grin out of him. Buck rested his chin on his shoulder, humming under his breath.

“Do you ever think about the fact that we both have tattoos in virtually the same place?” Buck murmured, Eddie looked down to where Buck’s right forearm was wrapped around his waist. One thick line and a thinner parallel one above it. He looked to his own left forearm where a line of script wrapped around in around the same place as Buck’s tattoo.

_Fortalecer la mente y supera el cuerpo._

“Strengthen the mind and overcome the body,” Buck said, remembering what Eddie had told him it meant a few weeks ago, one finger reaching out to trace the calligraphic letters. 

“What did you want me to think about?” 

“Well, I’ve been reading some crazy fantasy stuff okay, and I learned that some soulmate depictions are ones of soulmates having corresponding marks. Like some marks are the first words your soulmate says to you, or some are just a birthmark in the same spot.” Eddie burst out laughing, turning in Buck’s arms to pull his boyfriend closer. Buck’s reading habit wasn’t really a shock to him, but he had no idea Buck read fantasy novels. It was quite endearing to be honest, to see Buck put on his reading glasses and get lost in a book.

“I am of the belief that we’re soulmates just purely based on this,” Buck beamed at him, super proud at the connection to one of his books. It made him look absolutely adorable, the way he got so excited over things to geek out over. The soulmate implication burned right through him, setting every nerve of his alight.

“You may just be right, but there’s definitely a lot more to it. We’re soulmates, after all.” He kissed a still-shirtless Buck, smiling against his mouth.

“You feel so smug, asshole.” Buck pulled away, scoffing at the look on Eddie’s face. The twinkle in his eye gave him away immediately.

“Hey, I’ve got the best son and the best boyfriend in the world. I can afford to be a little smug.” Eddie winked before slipping out from under him to get ready, hearing Buck’s resounding laughter behind him.

“Daddy, Papa, I’m ready!” Christopher called out from the couch.

“Coming!” Twin shouts came from different places of the house. Eddie threw on his favourite maroon Henley, pushing the sleeves up to his elbows and pulled up his black jeans. He met with Buck outside after grabbing his wallet and phone, who had now thrown on a black T-shirt and regular blue jeans.

Christopher had taken off the sticker shirt, instead clad in a kid-size LAFD jersey that Chim had gotten him, and shorts. 

Swinging Christopher onto his back, Eddie tossed Buck his keys, instead choosing to take the passenger seat this time. Buck eagerly jumped into the driver’s seat, much more excited to drive Eddie’s truck than should be possible.

“Buck you’ve driven this before,” Eddie chuckled at his excitement, buckling himself up. Christopher laughed from the back, a happy and content giggle that Eddie had almost forgotten about, up until Buck came back into their lives.

“Yeah, but it’s so rare that I get to drive it without asking,” Buck smirked at Eddie before throwing the truck into gear and backing out of the driveway. “The park nearby?”

“Yup.” Eddie periodically looked into the rear-view mirror to see Christopher staring out of the window with a big smile on his face. He was such a happy child, but the past two months, Eddie hadn’t seen anything but an overjoyed look on his face. Eddie knew a huge part of that was because of Buck.

Buck entwined his fingers with Eddie, probably catching onto what Eddie was thinking. Eddie pressed a kiss to his boyfriend’s knuckles before shoving his hand away.

“Not so fast, buster. Both hands on the steering wheel when driving my truck,” Eddie teased, sending all three of them into fits of laughter. 

“Papa, Daddy’s just being a hypocrite,” Chris giggled, pronouncing ‘hypocrite’ slowly but deliberately. Eddie turned to look at him.

“Where did you learn that word?” It was a big word for a nine-year-old to know.

“Buck’s books,” Chris shrugged as a matter of explanation.

Eddie looked towards Buck who looked sheepishly at him briefly before turning his attention back to the road. “You know how some nights I sit down to read? Well sometimes, Chris and I read them together instead, and then look up words we don’t know. The word hypocrite was part of a book last week, I think.”

The first thought in Eddie’s head was, _I need pictures of this._

The second, more fitting, thought was, _God, I love these boys._

He had no idea things were about to get real ugly then.

* * *

Chris wanted to walk around the park instead of play, so the three of them started walking, chattering about everything under the sun. Buck and Christopher were in the midst of telling Eddie about the most recent books they’d brought back from the library when Buck froze up in the middle of a sentence, going dead silent.

Even Christopher noticed the change, tugging on Buck’s shirt. “Papa, what’s wrong?”

Eddie looked over to Buck, and found a very familiar fear in his face. Turning his head back to the front where Buck was looking, he saw red. 

Richard Buckley.

“Eddie, take Christopher and go,” Buck said quietly. Eddie’s neck whipped over to him, looking in pure disbelief. Buck couldn’t think that Eddie would leave him here with his father, who he despised. He could already see the slight tremble in his fingers.

Buck’s father stood in front of them, face red and jaw tight. 

“ _Eddie_ ,” Buck implored, letting Eddie’s name roll off a breathless syllable, a plea in his expression. Eddie absolutely hated the situation, but knew that with Christopher looking clueless between the two, there was nothing that he could do. Their son was far too smart.

He knew that having Christopher there would just trigger Buck further, especially considering his own experience with Richard Buckley. Buck wouldn’t want Christopher to be privy to that; at least, not at this age. 

“Let’s go Chris, Buck needs to talk to someone, okay?” 

For the first time in a very long time, Chris didn’t listen. He looked between Richard and Buck, his intuitive brain probably putting together the situation, but not understanding the next action.

“Papa, why is that man staring at you?” Christopher’s voice wasn’t loud, but Richard’s eyes shot up to his forehead. Eddie was almost positive that he would probably go into shock in the next thirty seconds if he heard any more news. He couldn’t help but feel a little smug about that too; Buck was worthy of being a father and Christopher would be sure that he knew it.

“Papa,” Richard repeated, a sneer on his tongue. He stepped forward and reached out to touch Christopher but while Eddie moved to pull his son away, Buck stepped in front to shield him from his father’s view, shoving his father not-so-gently backwards. Richard stumbled, shocked at the action.

To be honest, Eddie was a little taken aback too. Buck’s protective streak for Chris ran miles long, but he never resorted to violence. Seeing that only cemented how much Buck was capable of, and how patient he really was for only select events to bring that rage out in him.

“ _D_ _on’t_ touch him.” Just like that night at the party, Buck’s voice was dangerous, low and unforgiving as he hissed at his father’s face. Eddie saw the muscle in his cheek rapidly jump as Buck struggled to control himself. The two men stared each other down, anger increasing in Richard’s face by each passing minute.

Sensing that things were about to get out of hand, Eddie picked Chris up and started walking back to where the truck was parked, still shooting Buck’s dad a warning glare. 

“No, Daddy that man is scary. We have to keep Papa away from him,” Chris cried out, not wanting to leave Buck’s side either. Eddie’s footsteps stopped exactly where they were, just a few feet from Buck, just within earshot.

“We tried, kid. We really did,” he said morosely as he set Christopher back down and knelt in front of him. Christopher had definitely noticed the 180 degree change in Buck, and knew that his Papa didn’t get scared without good reason. 

“Papa will tell you about that man in his own time, okay? Right now, we just need to be there for him,” Eddie explained, knowing his son would immediately understand. True to his nature, Christopher nodded understandably before doing something so out of tune; he fixed Richard with a glare over Eddie’s shoulder. The angry look was so out of place on his adorable face, that it sent Eddie reeling a little, even if Richard couldn’t see him with both Eddie and Buck blocking his view.

“Hey, we don’t make those faces, alright?” It cut at Eddie to stop Chris from getting angry, because he was being just what Christopher had described him as: a hypocrite. Eddie would pummel Richard into the ground to protect Buck, but ultimately, it would do more harm than good. He didn’t want to project that temperament onto his son, and he knew Buck wouldn’t want it either. It didn’t do well to teach an impressionable child about holding ill will or sending not-so-nice looks to other people. 

The only piece of condolence he gave himself was that in one of the old myths his _abuela_ was always telling him about, she said that once a child wishes unwell onto someone for unfair treatment, that person would never be able to thrive. 

But then again, Buck had been a child too. No child holds malice in their hearts, and Buck’s heart even as an adult was big enough to not hold malice. He never spoke of wishing ill onto his parents for how they’d left him or how much they’d abused him. But he was human, and while he got angry, and downright _pissed_ off, he never genuinely wished them ill will. A trait of his boyfriend that he admired.

A horrifyingly familiar sound of skin-on-skin brought him right out of his thoughts and immediately up to hide Chris behind him. Eddie already knew that it would have been Richard to throw the first punch. In a mix of fury and terror, Eddie turned just in time to catch Richard take a swing at Buck, _again._ This time, Buck threw one back at him, the two men shoving at each other, Buck more so to defend and Richard more to attack him. Buck caught a poorly-timed punch and twisted his wrist around until he had Richard pinned face-first against the nearest tree.

Scooping Christopher up, Eddie ran back to the truck, pulling out his phone and dialing the only number he could think of, worry and anger pulsing through his bloodstream. Every protective inch of his body wanted to join Buck in fighting his father, but it would just make things worse. Eddie would have no legal justification to join that fight, and he’d land himself in jail right in front of Christopher.

“Athena, I need you here.” Rattling off the park’s name, he quickly put Chris in the car and told him not to move.

“I know you want to help Buck, _mijo_ , but I need to you stay here for me so I can go to him.” Christopher nodded, urging Eddie on. Pressing a fast kiss to his boy’s forehead, he sprinted back to where Buck was, finding that Richard was still pinned against the tree but struggling against Buck. 

A quick glance around proved that pretty much no one could see him here, and Eddie sent up a brief prayer for it. That’s when he realized that Buck was actually saying something. 

“I held onto everything you did to me for _years,_ keeping it to myself, keeping my mouth shut and head down. I even kept your heinous nature from my own sister, so she could stop drowning in her guilt.” Eddie’s heart broke at Buck’s heavy voice, the rage potent. Richard’s face was pressed hard into the rough bark, no doubt scraping the skin. “I watched my mother stay silent as you beat me, over and over and over again. You _hit_ a child, destroyed every sense of him that wanted to believe he’s worth something, filled his head with so many self-doubts that he still can’t work his way through them,” his voice cracked, splitting Eddie’s heart open as he neared the two.

“Up until I joined the 118, I hadn’t felt like I belonged anywhere. Now, at home, with my two boys, with my own _family_ ? I am right where I need to be.” Buck shoved Richard into the tree again, this time turning him around to face him. “I’m right where I want to be, in the arms of the man I love, the man _you_ insulted like he’s nothing. But he’s everything. _Everything._ I’m right where I belong, with our son’s arms around us, sitting around and just being _content_ with each other.”

“Buck.” Eddie couldn’t stop himself from speaking, having never seen his boyfriend like this before. Buck looked up and Eddie’s heart stopped at the trickle of blood that beaded on his lip, dripping down to his chin. There was a blooming bruise on his forehead too. His eyes were crazed, breathing hard. 

“No Eddie, I need to tell him this.” Turning his attention back to his father, Buck clutched his collar as he got into his face. The fear wafting off of Richard was palpable. “Now you come back, and _follow_ me here, and then you try to _touch my son?_ No fucking way, Richard. I’ve cut you out of my life a long time ago, there’s no way you’re going to get back in it. I won’t _let_ you. I won’t let you ruin this for me.”

“You’re pathetic, Evan. You don’t deserve this much happiness. You’re still that boy who was always average in everything.” That pissed Eddie off, but before he could say anything, sirens rang out. He heaved a sigh of relief, just as Athena came up to his side, her voice ringing out loud and clear.

“Well, Sir, I’m going to have to prove you wrong. This man saves so many lives in a single work day, and he’s worth far more than you are. Anyone like you doesn’t deserve a single explanation.” Athena looked just as angry as both Buck and Eddie felt. Athena wrapped her arm around Buck’s shoulder, the other fastening a handcuff onto Richard’s wrist. 

“Come on, Buckaroo,” Athena said gently. Buck stumbled away from his father, staggering and nearly collapsing knees-first. Eddie caught him immediately, pressing a desperate kiss to his hair as Buck stared open-mouthed, almost in disbelief.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he murmured, keeping his hold tight around his boyfriend.

“Where’s Christopher?” Buck managed to get out, the words coming out choked. 

“He’s in the truck.” Buck gave a nod of appreciation against Eddie’s chin, falling back against his chest.

“Still getting others to fight your battles? When are you going to grow up and be a man?” Richard yelled from where Athena was reading him his rights. That’s when Eddie snapped. He let go of Buck to march over to Richard, ignoring Buck’s whispered plea behind him, and pulled Richard up with a menacing hold on his collar. The flash of panic that flitted across the older man’s shrewd face only spurred him on.

“No one fights his battles for him. He’s far more of a man than you could ever be, and he’s fought against you _his entire life._ He’s fought against every doubt that you planted in his head, and he’s literally my inspiration _every single day._ And if I hear you say _one more word_ against _my_ boyfriend _ever_ again, I will very literally make sure that you live to regret every word,” Eddie growled, keeping his voice low so he didn’t put Athena in an awkward spot for having to throw him in jail for threatening a man.

“Why don’t you wetbacks just…” Before Richard could finish the sentence, Athena rattled his handcuffs roughly, shutting him up immediately.

“You do not want to finish that sentence, Mr. Buckley.” Her voice was dangerous. Shoving him into the back of the cop car, she turned towards Eddie, placing a placating hand on his shoulder.

“Eddie, you need to calm down, your anger isn’t going to help Buck right now. He needs you, and you know that,” Athena whispered, nodding to where Buck was still staring at the ground, eyes wide and blank. Eddie’s anger immediately simmered down. “He’s going to be arrested for battery and assault. I’m going to need you two to come down to the station to report this. You did good in not taking it in your own hands. God knows the man would’ve gotten what was coming, but it wouldn’t have been pretty for you two.” 

Eddie nodded in understanding. Athena patted his shoulder before moving to Buck. Eddie stayed rooted to where he was, wondering how such a beautiful day turned so horrific. It had really only been 15 minutes since Richard had shown up. He tried to breathe through the fog of anger clouding his system.

Athena was showering Buck with motherly concern and tough love, evident from Buck’s slightly relaxed posture. He was still looking at Eddie though, with desperation. Eddie recognized that look immediately, his feet automatically moving towards Buck; it was a sure sign he was about to fall apart.

Brushing his fingers over Buck’s knuckles, he gripped his boyfriend’s hand, pulling them both up. Athena smiled at the two of them before leaving.

“Let’s go, Evan.” Eddie kept his voice gentle but firm. He wanted to erase every bad memory Buck had associated with his first name, replacing it with newer, happier ones. “Christopher’s waiting for us.”

“Wait.” Buck stopped halfway to rub at the little bit of blood that had dried on his face. Eddie brought his sleeve to dust off the top of the bruise, but there was nothing else he could do.

Buck inhaled a shuddered breath before walking over to the truck, his hand clenched tight in Eddie’s. Christopher clung to Buck’s neck the second he pulled open the back seat to crawl in beside him. Eddie knew that Chris’ proximity would help Buck with his anxiety, and started up the truck as the two scooted closer to each other.

The entire ride to the police station, no one said a single word, leaving each man and child to their thoughts. Eddie kept looking back into the rear-view mirror, to see Chris slumped against Buck as much as the seat belt would allow, with Buck’s arms tight around the boy. He stared blankly out of the window opposite.

It tugged at his heartstrings. They’d been so happy on the way to the park, the cab of the truck bursting with laughter. Now, Eddie could feel the weight of the tense air pressing down on them.

He stifled a sigh and continued driving, relieved that both of the boys who held his heart were safe, if a bit shaken. 

* * *

Buck remained lost in his thoughts even on the way back home. He couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that his father thought he could touch Christopher. He’d never been so terrified in that moment. 

It seemed insignificant, a measly touch that could be washed off. But it really wasn’t; not to Buck. Those hands had served as _terrors_ for him, even now. They’d worked to ‘discipline’ Buck into what Richard Buckley wanted from him. Those fingers had bruised fear and unease into him. That touch had killed so many things _in_ him, and still, he found himself flinching unnaturally at sudden movements.

Buck didn’t want any part of that near their son. And he wanted to wash his own hands of Richard Buckley, both literally and figuratively.

That’s why he didn’t press any charges aside from assault and battery. Eddie had looked at him sharply, in disbelief, his hand jerking against Buck’s own but Buck kept his eyes pointed on Athena who seemed to understand the decision he chose to make. She’d said that she approved of the decision as a police officer.

Her next words made him want to cry.

_“As someone who cares about you, Buck, I’m itching to take this into my own hands.”_

_It reminded him of that time Bobby had told him about Athena being put on desk duty. Athena had pushed the boundaries of legality for the few people that were bullying May, fiercely protective over her daughter. Athena showing him the same concern stripped him raw right in the middle of the station._

_He simply gave her a forced chuckle, pulling her into a hug before he could chicken out._

_“Thank you, Athena.” Athena smiled against his shoulder, patting his back before telling Buck to go home and relax._

_“I’ve got this Buck. We’re with you.” She didn’t look at him with pity, but only worry for him. He appreciated Athena so much in that moment._

“Papa?” Christopher’s small voice jolted him out of his thoughts. That’s when he realized the truck was parked in the driveway, and Eddie was looking at him concernedly. From the look on his face, it wasn’t the first time either one of them had called his name. Buck looked down at Christopher, forcing a smile on his face for him. 

“Hey buddy, you okay?” His voice felt raw in his throat, but he forced the words out, trying to resemble something normal.

“I am, but you’re not.” Christopher’s words were quiet but meaningful. Eddie reached back to brush a stray curl from Christopher’s forehead. 

“Let’s go inside, okay?” Eddie coaxed them out of the truck, helping Christopher down.

Buck followed them in a trance, making a beeline for the bathroom as soon as he got inside. He stood in front of the mirror, looking at his reflection for a while. His eyes looked bleak and empty, and there was a nasty bruise on his forehead. His hair was wild from running his fingers through it. Running his tongue over his bottom lip, he could taste the metallic tang of blood and the slight sting from the saliva. He knew that his father had landed a few more, but Buck had definitely gotten the upper hand as soon as he got over his initial shock.

He pumped ungodly amounts of soap into his hands before scrubbing at them furiously, just like he had done two months ago, when he had completely shattered in the middle of Eddie’s shower stall. He washed off his hands and dried them off, staring at the same spot Eddie had held him.

“Sweetheart, I think you’ve washed them pretty well.” Eddie’s voice came from behind them just as Buck started washing his hands again. His hands came around Buck’s again, washing the soap and gently drying them, revealing the pale red tint to the skin. 

Just like before, Eddie’s touch could erase every vile feeling on his skin. Today though, Buck wasn’t panicking. He wasn’t anxious. He was purely _hurting._

“I’m sorry I let him get near Christopher, Eddie,” Buck whispered into the silence of the room. He could hear the shame and feeling of failure in his own voice.

“Don’t do this to yourself, Evan,” Eddie said sharply, his motions pausing as he tilted Buck’s head to meet his eyes. “He didn’t come near Christopher, you’d shielded him before he could even get a good look. You stood up to your father today, and that boy sitting on the couch is the one that gave you the strength to do that. You did not fail, don’t even think about it.” 

Buck froze, realizing how true the words were. He had never reacted so violently before, but seeing his father near Christopher had frozen every single flight instinct he had.

“He did, didn’t he?” Quiet pride rang out in his voice. Suddenly, Buck felt the need to go to him. Eddie caught on quickly, tugging Buck out of the room.

“Go change into comfy clothes and meet us on the couch,” Eddie pointed to where Buck’s clothes from this morning were folded on the dresser. 

“Eddie.” Buck pulled him back just as he was turning to leave. Cupping his boyfriend’s stubbled cheeks, Buck looked at him for a while before leaning forward to press his appreciation onto the other man’s mouth. “Thank you, sweetheart.” Eddie deepened the kiss before giving Buck the lopsided smile that had doomed Buck to fall for him from the very start.

“I’ll wait for you outside.”

When he got back, only Christopher was on the couch. He immediately snuggled into Buck as soon as his butt hit the couch. Buck pulled them up so they were laying pretty much horizontally on the length of the couch, Christopher sprawled across his chest. Buck held the boy tight as he inhaled Christopher’s smell, reassuring himself that he was safe. 

Eddie came back in with a bottle of water and tapped Buck’s shoulder as a signal for him to get up. Adjusting the three of them onto the couch was definitely a struggle, but they managed it, Eddie’s arms coming around the both of them. Buck felt himself relax, sandwiched in between the two people that mattered most to him in the world. They snuggled into each other as one of Christopher’s cartoons played out on TV.

“Who was that man, Papa?” Christopher asked. Buck had anticipated the question, but didn’t think it’d take him so long to ask it. Eddie’s fingers danced along his side, tapping out a silent question. Buck didn’t think it was fair to hide things from Christopher, but he wanted to make sure with Eddie before he said anything. He tilted his head up to see Eddie’s eyebrow raised, clearly giving him the decision-making power.

Taking a deep breath, Buck settled Chris more securely against him as he tried to formulate an answer. “That was my dad.” Chris’ head shot up from where it was nestled on Buck’s chest.

“Really?” His little eyebrows furrowed together in an adorable frown. Despite himself, Buck smiled tiredly as he smoothed out those lines. Eddie rubbed encouraging circles against Buck’s shoulder.

“Yeah.”

“But he was so mean.” This was the hard part. How do you explain to a child that not all fathers were like his?

Buck decided to play it by ear. “Buddy, not all fathers are nice to their kids, you know? My dad...he wasn’t like your super cool dad over here.” Eddie’s chest vibrated with laughter at that. Chris sent his dad a beaming smile before turning his attention back to Buck.

“My dad…” This was where he was stuck. He knew it’d break Christopher’s heart to hear of him abused, no matter how mellow Buck made it. “My dad did a lot of not-nice things to me. Things no parent should ever do to their kids.” Maybe when Christopher was older, he’d tell him the full story, but for right now, this was more than enough. 

“Like hit you?” Chris traced a finger over the bruise, much like he’d been tracing Buck’s tattoos just a few hours ago.

The child was far too intuitive for his own good. Buck nodded, not being able to speak the words. He held his breath as a multitude of emotions floated across the young boy’s face before settling on grief. Chris pulled himself up Buck’s body to throw his arms around both Eddie and Buck. 

“My dads are the best, and I’m grateful to have them,” he whispered into Buck’s neck. Buck tilted his head back into the groove of Eddie’s neck, fighting tears. 

“Don’t worry Papa, we’re here for you. And I love you and Daddy for saving me from that man.” Buck lost the fight with his tears, the salty liquid tracing a straight path down his cheeks as he held onto Christopher. Eddie leaned down to press a kiss to the top of Chris’ hair. With the angle that they were laying at, he could only reach Buck’s cheek as he kissed a tear away.

“I think you might have saved me today, little man.” Buck choked out through his tight throat. 

Christopher pulled back to bring his hand to Buck’s chin. “You’re going to be okay, kid.” Buck gave a watery laugh as he turned to look at Eddie, taking in his smile and glistening eyes.

“I love you,” Buck said quietly. Eddie had brought him the best thing in his life: this family. For that, Buck would always remain grateful to him. He pressed their foreheads together as Chris shuffled himself around. Unwittingly, he winced as Chris pressed on a bruise his father had landed. 

Eddie pulled back instantly, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “Did you get hit anywhere aside from your face?” 

Buck’s hesitation to answer probably told Eddie all that he needed to know, because Eddie’s face hardened as he shifted from beneath Buck. “Christopher _,_ could you move off of Buck please?”

Chris complied, Buck settling him down on the floor before sitting up straight. Eddie hiked up Buck’s shirt and took a sharp intake of break as he took in the blossoming bruise along his side.

“It looks worse than it is.” Eddie brushed cold fingers over the bruised skin, his teary eyes meeting Buck’s. His dosage of blood thinning medicine had gone down in recent months, but it still lead to easy bruising.

“Let me get the first aid kit,” he murmured before high-tailing it out of the room. Buck knew that he didn’t want anyone to see him cry at a moment like this, but honestly, Buck’d forgotten about the bruise until just now.

He gave it one moment before he got up to follow him. Eddie was clutching the edge dresser tight with both hands, knuckles gone white as his head stayed downcast.

Buck wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, resting his head on his back. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“I’m not upset you didn’t tell me,” Eddie’s hushed voice came, still sounding wobbly. “I’m upset that I was right there and he still hurt you so much.” Buck turned him around to face him, his heart breaking at the look on Eddie’s face.

“You did what you could. If Christopher wasn’t there, I have no doubt that I’d be bailing you out of jail right now.” Buck thumbed the apples of Eddie’s cheeks, lightly laughing.

“Damn straight, I would’ve pummeled him into the ground.” Eddie kissed Buck softly, like a promise. Buck smiled against his mouth and pulled away to sit on the bed.

“If I let you treat the bruise, will it give you some peace of mind?”

“I don’t think you have a choice in the matter, but to humor you, yes,” Eddie sassed back, already opening the kit and gloving up. He rolled his eyes at that.

“Alright Firefighter Diaz, let’s see what you can do.” Buck laid down on his side and pulled his shirt up enough to expose the bruise. Eddie started rubbing a disinfecting wipe over the entire area, then moved onto poking and prodding for any rib cage damage.

“How did you get this?” Eddie asked softly. The question was enough to tighten Buck’s muscles, all former pretense of humor gone.

“He pushed me into a tree.” Buck kept his voice carefully impassive, not wanting Eddie to worry, or for himself to get triggered into a memory. “The same tree I held him against.” He watched as Eddie’s expression twisted with pain, and brushed his own fingers against Eddie’s chest to try to soothe it.

The two men stayed silent after that, Eddie deeming to just be a bruise and applying a cream over it anyway. Buck pulled his shirt down and went back outside to Christopher as Eddie cleaned up.

“Did I hurt you?” Christopher asked as soon as he heard Buck approach.

“Oh no, no you didn’t.” His heart squeezed at Christopher’s worry. “Come here.” He held an arm out for Christopher as he settled on the ground next to where he was coloring. They snuggled into each other just as Eddie came back and plopped down on the sofa. He still looked pretty down, so Buck pulled Christopher up too and the three of them went back to their little cuddle sandwich. 

He turned his head up to ghost his lips along the bottom of Eddie’s tightly clenched jaw.

“Stop worrying Eds, it’s fine. It’s over. It’ll heal. _We’ll_ heal.”

“Why didn’t you lodge a case against him?” Buck sighed, having anticipated this question too.

“Eds, if I had gone through with a child abuse case on him, we’d be stuck with this for _years_. It’s been nearly ten years since I left home, since he last abused me. I don’t have any proof at all; no police reports, hospital reports, no witnesses. It’s futile, and honestly, a waste. He’s not worth uprooting the peace of our home.” It was simple. Buck had gotten his closure in the interrogation room.

_“You’ve controlled my life ever since I was born. And now, I’m taking the reins back. I hope I never see you again.”_

_Richard stared at him, a dark look in his eye. Buck remained steadfast this time, not even shaking under the force of his glare._

_“I have my family waiting for me out there. They don’t need this, and quite frankly, I’m done with this bullshit. I’m not pathetic, and I deserve all the happiness that comes my way, because I’ve been fighting for it for a very long time.” The sentence brought him back to a once-conversation with Bobby, where he’d been wondering how long he needed to wait to be happy too. Turned out that the answer was literally breaking the ATM open with him._

_He smiled to himself ruefully before turning and catching himself, wanting to get one last word in. “And tell Mom she’s not welcome in my life either.” With that closing note, Buck left the interrogation room, walking straight to where Eddie was sitting._

“I got what I need right here. And it’s more than enough,” Buck gestured to the three of them lounging on the couch. A thought occurred to him then.

“The only thing we really need is a bigger couch.” 

Christopher and Eddie started laughing at that, Buck joining in. The laughter rang out true and merry, putting Buck at ease and having him thank his lucky stars for having these two at his side.

They were proof that he did deserve the comfort of a family, and that families held each other up throw the darker times, only to come out stronger _together._

He would be damned sure to keep it that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Terms of Endearment are my thing, obviously.
> 
> Prompt: A follow-up that has Eddie, Chris and Buck out at the park or something and Chris has decided to call Buck Papa, and Richard finds them and tries to put a hand on Chris, and Buck just absolutely slugs him.
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are much appreciated!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A follow-up where Athena checks up on Buck, Maddie finds out and the firefam learns of Buck's childhood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! This was requested by @missmeagan666 and @Starlight00001 through the comments on the previous chapters!
> 
> I think this chapter wraps this fic up, hopefully xD I've been working on that MCD fic of mine but I managed to write this up too! A little fluffy and a little angsty, hopefully this meets your expectations!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Trigger Warnings: Some descriptions of child abuse

Life moved on like it always did.

The day after the incident at the park, Eddie took both his boys to the nearest furniture store to search for a bigger couch, much to Buck’s chagrin.

He'd caught sight of the brightly colored store and started shaking his head immediately.

“I didn’t say we had to do this now, Eddie! We can't be dropping this much money on a new couch! Eddie Diaz, let go of me!” Buck protested, digging his heels into the ground as Eddie tried to drag him forwards by the wrist. Christopher’s giggles could be heard as he leaned against Eddie’s truck, watching his Papa protest like a child.

“Papa!” His gleeful voice caught Buck’s attention immediately. He stilled in his spot as he turned to look at the boy. 

“Christopher, tell your dad that we can do this later.” Buck tried to convince Christopher next, giving him the infamous puppy eyes that had everyone convinced that Buck was part golden retriever.

“Nice, trying to use our kid against me,” Eddie scoffed, crossing his arms. Buck paused at Eddie addressing Chris as _their_ kid, Richard’s words still fresh in his mind. Christopher, God bless the kid, sensed the same thing, and instantly shifted his weight onto one crutch to tug Buck’s shirt. That brought Buck out of his head.

“Papa, we have to get a new couch. That one has been in our house for years,” Chris pointed out. Eddie shrugged and agreed. That couch was peeling slightly and it was worn down now. He planned to just sell it on Facebook Marketplace or something. 

“Yeah, and you have to move in too.” Buck’s head snapped up, eyes wide. A small smirk flitted at Eddie’s lips, but his eyes were genuine and honest.

“Move in?” His voice was barely a whisper.

“Yeah, people in love with each other are supposed to live together forever and ever.” Their son looked between the two men, wondering exactly what was taking them so long to understand such a simple thing. “Now hurry up.”

Christopher marched off, leaving Buck and Eddie to stare across the space between them.

“That kid gets his brains from me,” Eddie said lightly. Despite himself, Buck scoffed, earning a glare from his boyfriend. “Buck, come on. You have literally a month left on your lease. Will you move in with us?” He realized that neither Eddie nor Christopher had even _asked_ Buck if he’d want to do that.

“Are you sure?” Buck asked, self-doubt glimmering at his edges. He turned his face to watch Christopher who was now waiting in front of the door impatiently. 

Eddie stared at his profile for a quick second, feeling the familiar dregs of anger as they lit up inside him. He hated that Buck’s parents, the ones who were supposed to love him the most, who were supposed to support everything in him, had him feeling this way. 

He also hated seeing the faintly purple marks on Buck’s face, hated that he knew a larger one was spread across his side.

Cupping his boyfriend’s jaw carefully, he turned Buck’s face towards him, maneuvering the two so he could keep an eye on both Christopher and Buck.

“Evan, I am one hundred percent sure, just like I’m completely sure that I’m _irrevocably_ in love with you. I wanted you to move in long before we even started dating, but I didn’t have the courage to ask. Now that I do, let me ask you again. Will you move in with us?”

Buck’s eyes shone brightly with joy as the last shadows of doubt dissipated. He stepped closer to kiss Eddie briefly before grinning widely.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll move in,” Buck laughed, brushing a finger across Eddie’s collar. Eddie beamed at him before side-stepping his boyfriend.

“Then let’s get this couch!” He called out behind him. After two seconds, Eddie finally heard the crunch of gravel underneath Buck’s shoes, signalling that he was following. 

“Bet I could race you.” Buck caught up to him and took off almost immediately. Eddie laughed and broke out into a sprint, still ending up at Christopher a half-second before him.

“You cheated,” Buck insisted as they walked in. Christopher and Eddie laughed at his antics.

“You took off before I did, if anyone cheated, it was you,” Eddie pointed out. 

“Cheater,” Buck pouted. Eddie, clearly unable to help himself around Buck, kissed the pout away.

“Gross!” Christopher groaned, moving to be in front of them. “Dad, keep your hands to yourself.”

Eddie’s mouth dropped open as he gaped at his son. Buck was howling with laughter behind him and the pure sound had caught the attention of a few other shoppers.

“I’ll show you.” Eddie moved to tickle Christopher, keeping his touch gentle. Christopher laughed loudly until a stray crutch hit Eddie’s shin. “Oops, sorry Daddy!”

Biting back a curse, he stepped away from Christopher and rubbed the bruising spot. His good mood was still intact as he patted Christopher’s back reassuringly. “It’s all good, buddy. It happens. Now, where do we want to start?”

It turned out that Buck and Christopher could not be trusted in a home decorating store, at all.

Eddie found himself parenting not one, but _two_ children as the pair of them excitedly went around the store. For someone who had so vehemently protested the idea of coming to the furniture store, Buck was the one leading them around the entire store. Even Christopher, who had previously hated anything to do with shopping, was giving his input everywhere.

He smiled to himself as Buck and Chris discussed a cutlery set between the two of them as seriously as possible, snapping pictures all the way. He probably looked borderline insane to other people in the store, because it really was just furniture shopping. But his two boys had a way of making the most mundane tasks seem like a big deal, and it was Buck that was showing them how to enjoy every little thing in life.

“Y’all are the devils on each other’s shoulders, did you know that?” Eddie said as they walked towards the cashier. They ended up buying not only a larger, comfier sofa but four decorative wall pieces, a rug and three new vases that Eddie had no clue what to fill with. Despite his protests, Buck had swiped his card before Eddie could even reach for his wallet.

“Shush Eddie, this is serious business,” Buck waved him off, beaming down at Christopher. “Right, Christopher?”

“Right,” Christopher agreed, fist-bumping his Papa. The exchange made Eddie feel like jelly, but he shook his head anyway.

“God give me strength around these two,” he muttered to himself as he picked up the bags.

“You guys are an adorable family,” the cashier said, her eyes bright as she looked between the three of them. Buck looked like he was remembering another time as he smiled at the lady.

“Thank you!” Christopher piped up, pulling laughs out of not only the cashier, but also the people waiting behind them. Eddie sent a quick prayer up to protect his family from any evil eye, and ushered Buck and Christopher out.

“Alright,let’s get some food and head back.”

* * *

“They delivered the sofa this morning,” Buck offered as a greeting as he walked into the station on Monday. Eddie’s shift started an hour earlier than Buck’s on this particular day, so he was already eating breakfast by the time Buck got there. Buck had dropped Christopher off at school before making his way to the firehouse.

Eddie nodded around a sip of coffee, bringing a smile out of Buck who knew that that was likely Eddie’s third cup. The man would bathe in coffee if he could. He headed to pick up his own mug before plopping into his seat next to Eddie.

“Did you eat?” Eddie turned towards him, having noticed Buck’s empty plate.

“Yeah, Chris and I had enough time to make pancakes before I dropped him off.” Buck quickly kissed his concerned boyfriend before turning his attention back to his phone.

“Can y’all just go get married already?” Chim groaned, having overheard them from the stairs as he walked up with Hen and Bobby in tow.

“Let us move in together first,” Eddie smirked at the chorus of gasps and excited squeals. Buck laughed at their unadulterated reactions before turning to face them completely.

All humor ceased immediately in favour of concerned and worried looks. Buck frowned in confusion before he remembered the bruises and cuts on his face. He sent Eddie a panicked look as the two of them stood up.

“Buck, what happened?” Hen breathed, coming closer to take a look. Immediately, Chim had pulled out a flashlight and was checking his pupillary reflexes. Buck ignored the anxiety coursing through him to push Chim’s hand gently away.

“Chim, it’s fine. Eddie already looked me over, they just look bad because of the blood thinners.”

“Buck, what happened?” Bobby stepped closer to him. Unconsciously, Buck took a step back into Eddie. Bobby stopped immediately, his forehead creasing in confusion but Buck hated that he _reacted_ like that. Just like before, Eddie didn’t move from his spot, his shoulder pressing into Buck’s back to ground him.

Two voices chattering from the bunk sent a sliver of dread down his spine.

_Maddie and Athena_

The two appeared on the stairs, Buck’s eyes immediately seeking out Athena’s to see how much she told his sister. Discerning from Maddie’s beeline to her boyfriend first with a cursory hello to her brother, probably nothing.

Athena cocked her head silently towards the locker rooms. Buck walked around the rest of his team before Maddie could even look at him, hearing the faint sounds of his sister asking them what had happened. The tension was thick as the team watched their youngest member go down the stairs.

“Was the court not able to get a restraining order?” Buck asked immediately after the glass door shut behind him. He'd called the station and requested to file one last night, to protect Christopher more than anything else.

“No, wait, what?” Athena said, looking confused. “That’s not what I’m here for, Buck.”

“Then what happened?” Athena rolled her eyes and sat down on the bench.

“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not in uniform. I’m not working, I just came to check up on you. How are you doing?” the cop asked, patting the seat next to her.

He blinked at her, speechless at the thought. She’d come to the station just to check up on him? Buck lowered himself down beside her and gave her a relieved smile.

“Honestly, I’m doing great. I’d almost forgotten completely about the incident until just now. I had forgotten that I had bruises on my face that couldn’t really be covered,” Buck admitted. “That’s what all that was.”

“Do they hurt?” The question was void of Athena’s normal tough strength, just a quiet sentence. He knew that she wasn’t talking about just the darkening marks. Buck studied her, surprised to find that much affection and fondness in her gaze for _him_ no less. Her coming to the station to check up on him was greatly appreciated, and he would make sure to let her know that.

“Not at all. It just looks really bad,” Buck reassured her. He linked his hands and stared at the lockers, remembering a similar conversation with Hen in this exact spot. “If I’m being completely honest, I don’t care.”

“Well, you don’t, but you have one whose talking to you, four people who are breathing down our necks worriedly right now, and one who’s practically vibrating in his place to make sure you’re okay. So I think it’s completely safe to say that _someone_ does.” Athena’s voice held that wry humor again as she glanced at the glass. Buck looked over his shoulder and despite the twisted feeling in his gut, he smiled at the five adults who were peering through the thick glass at them.

His gaze found Bobby’s first though.

“You know what really makes me mad at my father?” Buck spoke quietly, shifting his attention to his hands. “I flinched away from _Bobby_ when he took a step towards me just now. And I think Bobby already has an idea of what this is about, just from it, but I _hate_ that I reacted like that. I hate that I made my captain feel like I was _scared_ of him.”

“I’m no psychiatrist, but I think it’s because Bobby’s been your father figure ever since you started at the 118. With yesterday’s incident, you just reacted to him like you used to react towards Richard, and that’s okay.” Athena picked up his hand in her own. “It’s okay, Buck. You can’t control everything, and honestly, you never react like that around him usually. You’re just on edge, even when you think you aren’t.”

“Will he be mad?” Buck’s voice was small. 

“Not at all.” Athena shook her head, heart squeezing at how tiny the normally-confident firefighter looked. “I didn’t marry a fool,” she added, pulling a chuckle from Buck.

“How’d you know they were there?” He turned back to Athena, who was studying him just as he’d studied her. 

“I’m a cop, I notice everything,” Athena winked as the two stood up. “Buck, I’m glad you’re okay, and I know you probably don’t want to bring this up again, but I think it would do you good if you talked to them about it because you wanted to. We’re worried about you, and the only reason I know anything is because I responded to that call, am I right?”

She was, no matter how much the thought didn’t sit well with him. He didn’t have anything to be ashamed of. He was a survivor, and he would be damn sure not to let his father take that from him. “Do you have somewhere to be? I think I’d feel better if you were here too.”

“If that’s what you want, I’ll stay too.”

Buck gave her a relieved grin. "Thank you, Athena, I appreciate you being here for me."

"Anytime, Buckaroo," She beamed at him and patted his back as they walked out. Maddie rushed at him first, cupping his face with gentle fingers as she looked him over.

During her examination, Buck gave a worried Eddie a quick nod, his heart feeling two sizes too big and skin two sizes too small as the older man’s shoulders sagged with relief.

“Mads, I’m fine. They just look bad,” he repeated again, holding Maddie’s wrists in his hands.

“What happened, Evan?” Her eyes were glistening as they searched his. Buck pulled her hands away from his face before he exhaled slowly, looking between each friend of his.

“I’m only going to do this once, so let’s all go sit upstairs and hope the alarm doesn’t ring before I’m finished.” He said. Eddie came to Buck’s side, brushing the back of his hand against Buck’s in a silent gesture before he left Maddie and Buck to walk upstairs alone.

Once they were all settled, Buck started talking, his sister's hand gripped tight in his. “Before I say anything, Mads, I would definitely have told you alone, but I don’t have it in me to repeat this over and over again.”

Maddie nodded understandably. Eddie was seated across from him, perched on the armchair of Chim and Hen’s sofa. He smiled encouragingly at Buck, and that gave him the strength to start speaking.

“My father did this to me.” He kept his voice impassive, even as his hands trembled. A terse silence settled over the room, as Buck dropped his eyes to the ground. His sister’s nails dug into his palm unknowingly as she gasped, but Buck used the sting to ground himself as he continued.

“He’s one of the top businessmen in the United States, one of the top CEOs of a huge company. My mom was more of an impassive wife and mother, she really didn’t see any fault in anything her husband did, and honestly, I don’t think she cared much about him to say anything. I don’t know if that’s how this was for you too, but this definitely got worse after you left.” He directed the last question to his sister, meeting her teary eyes with his own damp ones. 

“They had intended to have Maddie, but I was a surprise baby, and my father spent every living minute making sure I understood the difference between us. And it wouldn’t always be through words; his hands, fists, belts, shoes would all play a recurring role in making sure I stayed in my limits.” He didn’t even risk a glance upwards as he continued, tears now freely making their way down his face. Maddie’s hand jerked in his, her having not even known that her brother had been _abused_ in the same household that she’d grown up in, where no one had dared to put a hand on her. Self-loathing gripped her tightly as she forced herself to listen to her younger brother speak.

Buck forced words out through the rock in his throat. “Maddie had been the one to take care of me mostly when we were younger, and she tried so hard to make sure things would be normal for me, but then she was sent off to college.”

“The physical abuse started after that, though I couldn’t figure out exactly why. I had been too young to say or do anything, but I was old enough for him to threaten me into never letting Maddie know. I was old enough to understand that _I_ didn’t want her to know, because I knew she’d blame herself.” Buck turned to face his sister, whose head was hung in shame. “And I know it’s not your fault, don’t blame yourself.” Maddie fell against his side, sobbing freely. He pulled her close and continued.

“That’s why I stepped away from you, Bobby, it wasn’t because I was scared of you. It was an unconscious reaction, one that’s ingrained into my brain. Flinching away from my father is an inbuilt gut reaction. It’s because I see you as a father figure that my mind just got a little confused at who was in front of me.” It wasn’t a secret around here that Bobby was, in all sense of the word, Buck’s dad. Bobby was looking at him steadily, eyes free of any judgement. He nodded his head reassuringly and motioned for Buck to continue, pulling Athena closer with one arm.

“He had my life planned out to the last letter. He’s controlled my life since before I was even born. Everything I did, even after I left, was inevitably affected by what I thought _he_ would want. He’d already decided that I was going to go into law, but I hated it. I didn’t want to become a lawyer, I had wanted to become a doctor at the time. He’d been the one to decide which colleges I was going to apply to, and while I did apply to all of those, I also secretly sent one to UCLA. Not because it was a good school or whatever, but because it was on the other side of the country.

“That period was the worst in my life, because one day, the UCLA admission letter came in, and I hadn’t gotten to the mail before him. Richard saw that letter first, and that night, he beat me so hard, I must’ve laid in my own blood for half an hour before I got even a little bit of strength to pick myself up.” He squeezed his eyes shut, relieving the entire moment.

A familiar heavy hand settled on his knee.

_Eddie_

Buck opened his eyes and looked down at his boyfriend, who was now sitting criss-cross on the ground next to Buck. Buck held his hand out and squeezed Eddie’s. Maddie was shaking now, trying to stifle all her sobs.

“Maddie, at that point, I was so glad you were gone, even if all I wanted to do was beg you to take me with you. I would’ve hated if you saw me like that, because it would’ve killed you.”

“It’s killing me now, Evan.” Her words were muffled but clear enough for everyone to hear.

“It turned out that I got a full-ride to the university, so I took what little things I had, and all the money I’d saved up, and got the hell out of there. It was one of the best times of my life, I was studying biology, I was living as free as I could be. I’d even done South American study abroad semesters during my undergraduate. Which, Bobby, was where I learned about the parasites.” Bobby smiled faintly, his hand clutched in Athena’s.

“I’d gotten a degree in fire science as well, before I realized I even wanted to be a firefighter. I got that certificate because it was interesting. Tried out for the SEALs, decided that shutting off my emotions wasn’t for me, and then decided to enroll at the fire academy. The rest is history.” 

“But what about the bruises?” Chim asked.

“A couple of months ago, do you remember that call about a child stuck in a chair? It turned out that our parents were there. My dad wasn’t pleased to finally find me after nearly ten years, and then he told me to attend this event with them. I didn’t want him looking for you, Mads, so I ended up attending. It turned out to be a ruse to get me to go back to Pennsylvania.” 

“Why didn’t you want him to know?” Maddie pulled back to look at him, eyes red-rimmed and puffy. “He’d never said anything to me, never laid a hand on me.”

“Maddie, he was standing there telling me how much he liked Doug. Now that I know Richard for what he is, there was no way I was letting him close to you.” Buck looked into his sister’s eyes, and remembered when she’d first come to LA.

How terrified he’d been when he’d asked her if she was in some type of danger, how he couldn’t even look at her as he lowered himself down on the coffee table. How afraid he had been to find out that he had been right all along.

How his sister, who had remained so strong for all his life, who’d easily stepped into the parenting role for him, had trembled, her voice so shaky.

He remembered seeing that faint glimmer of hope in her eyes when he told her that he had an idea for a perfect job, something that would let her start over again.

He imagined that this situation was the exact same with the two of them. This time, it was him who was being questioned, but he already had his hope, he’d already started over. This time, there was just disbelief and regret over a long-gone past. There was only guilt left, one that Buck hoped to high heaven that he could erase.

“No Buck, Dad hated Doug so much. Him and Mom have never let me forget it, even though I stopped talking to them years ago. I don’t know why they hated him, seeing that he was rich, a doctor, came from an influential line, but they never liked him. He probably said that to get a rise out of you, since they knew how much _you_ hated him.”

Maddie had gotten married a few years before Buck ran away for college, and he knew that his sister knew that he’d run away from home. But she didn’t know why, and no matter how many times she’d asked him since the matter, he stayed tight lipped. 

Now she knew.

“This is why you left?” Maddie voiced the thought now, all the pieces falling into place. “Why did you hide it from me, for so many years?” Once she found out, she’d called him multiple times, over and over again. Then, in a couple of years, those faded out too, until Buck believed that she’d stopped caring. It’d been nearly twenty long years of keeping his mouth shut; now that it’d opened, it didn’t seem like it would close again.

“Do you remember what I told you when you first came to LA? I’d told you that standing between you and anyone that thinks they can hurt you is exactly where I want to be standing.” Buck paused, tightening his hand in Eddie’s. “I don’t know if Richard ever intended to hurt you, but in my mind, all I saw was that monster that ruined me, and all I knew was that I had to protect you from it.”

“Evan.” The choked sound was nearly his undoing. Buck pulled his sister close and risked a glance at the rest of the team to find them in various forms of anger and sadness.

Bobby looked stricken, as he stared at Buck through pained eyes that shone with a new type of...respect? It was a strange look on Bobby’s face, Buck had never seen it before, but he knew that it was an appreciative one. Athena looked downhearted but there was a need for vengeance shadowing her eyes. Chimney and Hen just looked angered, looking like they could strangle something. But all of them looked just as protective and caring for them as Eddie had looked. 

“We ran into him again at the park yesterday, and he reached out to touch Christopher and I just...lost it. I didn’t want him anywhere near Chris, so I shoved him away but he threw the first punch and after that, everything’s a bit of a blur. But Eddie called Athena and he was arrested.”

“Without bail,” Athena said with conviction. “Buck didn’t press any charges aside from assault and battery, but I had a friend of mine dig into him a little last night. It turns out he’s doing a lot of illegal stuff to fund that business of his, so if I’m not wrong, he’ll be in jail for a very long time.”

“Either way, I’ve washed my hands of anything to do with our parents. I just want them to stay the hell away from my family,” Buck concluded quietly. Chim came over first, bypassing Maddie with a quick kiss to her head to pull Buck up and into a hug. He was surprised but he wrapped his arms around him anyway. 

Then came Hen, then Eddie, then Maddie, then Athena and finally, Bobby. They stayed huddled together like that for a really long time, the warmth of everyone around him settling into his bones.

He was loved in this room, and they let him know it.

“I’m sorry you had to suffer through all of that Buck, but I’m glad you trusted us enough to tell us,” Hen spoke as they let go of the group hug. Buck smiled and thanked her.

“Thank you guys for being here for me.” It was all he could manage through his tight throat. 

"We're always there for you, son," Bobby said. The term of endearment didn't go unnoticed, and Buck smiled widely at his captain, Bobby mirroring the same look.

Maddie was still silent by his side. Everyone seemed to notice that they needed some time alone, so they left to do other work around the station. Eddie and Chim gave their respective significant others quick kisses of support before they joined the others.

“I’m sorry, Evan.” Maddie held his hands in her own smaller ones. Buck went to interrupt her but she stopped him before he could speak. “No, let me say this. I didn’t know that Dad was like that. They never let me know anything. I didn’t know that he’d been abusing you, but now I think that I got my share of your pain through Doug.”

“No Maddie, no. That’s not it.” Buck shook his head vehemently, scooting closer to his sister. “Don’t ever think that. Doug and Richard are just their own brands of asshole. It’s not our fault. We survived them, and that’s all that matters.”

Maddie looked at him silently. Tears were still streaking down her pale face.

“I’m so proud of the man you’ve become, Evan. I don’t care what you had to do to get here, all I know is that you grew into the best man you could be. I see you with Eddie and Christopher, and it sends me reeling that my little brother has built himself a family all on his own. And this fire family? It’s a blessing that you deserve.” Maddie brushed a tear from Buck’s face. “You deserve all the happiness in the world, and I’m so glad you’ve found it.”

Buck shook his head. “No Mads, _we’ve_ found it. You deserve to be happy too.”

The Buckley siblings turned to look at Eddie and Chim, who were busy squabbling over how to roll a fire hose. To Hen and Bobby who were discussing the salt content of Bobby’s breakfast scramble and Athena who smacked both of them on the head before shoving them out of the kitchen.

Fondness took hold of them as they walked back towards the team.

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you two kissing at the table.” Bobby mock-scolded Buck as he neared.

“Buck kissed me, I didn’t do anything!” Eddie called from where he’d just finished putting the hose away, much to the amusement of everyone else. 

“I didn’t see you fighting it, Diaz,” Buck snorted as Eddie walked back in with a radiant smile on his face. "As I recall, you kissed me back."

“Don’t call me Diaz,” Eddie said pleasantly before slapping a hand over Bobby’s eyes to peck Buck’s forehead. Bobby shoved Eddie’s hand away with an exasperated grin on his face. Everyone started howling at the loophole Eddie found as they found their chairs for breakfast. Buck rolled his eyes affectionately at his boyfriend and made a face at the sight of Maddie and Chim making goo-goo eyes at each other like teenagers.

As the alarm rang before they could even eat anything, Buck couldn’t help but think to himself that they’d found a happiness far greater than anything anyone deserved.

He wouldn't trade it for the world.

**Author's Note:**

> How was it? As always, kudos and comments are much appreciated.
> 
> My tumblr ask box is open for Buddie Prompts @zeethebooknerd but I may take a little while to get around to it because of finals coming up! I promise I'm working on them! :D 
> 
> You can scroll to the top for the kissing prompts list!


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